But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. (Galatians 5:22-23)

Tonight, I again got the laughs. This isn’t the first time I get them, and I started to wonder why I’m suddenly experiencing them. I’ve heard about that “holy laughter” and what I got was nowhere near as strong or LOUD as what I’ve seen on YouTube, for me it was sudden, unexpected, ridiculously satisfying moments of joy. But I was still in control of myself, I was just caught up in such peace and affection toward the Lord.

I wish I could understand. Is all “holy laughter” legitimately from God? The way I felt tonight wasn’t me getting worked up and stuff… Which made me wonder and consider that maybe this truly was the Holy Spirit ministering to me. I gotta admit, before worship I was feeling fearful and really insecure and downcast and just wanting to leave the room and not have to face people. I felt like crying and I was nervous. But after worship, I felt at ease and unawkward and at peace.

Maybe since we were meeting up to get information about a mission trip, maybe this was why I felt the awful way I felt before worship. No matter how hard I tried to keep a straight face and appear cheerful and friendly and talkative, I couldn’t shake that awful way I felt. Maybe the Lord is already having to minister to us and help us because of that crazy resistance that is experienced on all those mission trips that are headed toward really spiritually dark places. Or as Chris called it, “places that are on the brink of revival.” :D

I think I will call what I get, “the laughs”. I can’t bring myself to call it “holy laughter”, simply because I’m not out of control the way I’ve seen people get in the startling videos I’ve seen on YouTube… It is great to see so many people that aren’t afraid to clap and raise their arms and kneel and walk around. I love seeing His people express themselves in the ways they feel led to worship. But I love that it also doesn’t look pagan.

Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders..

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