I used to look at Ashley, Sandi, and Ti with such amazement and awe for being single into their 30s.
But I’ve been realizing that, it really wouldn’t be too difficult. I’m 22, what’s a few more years?
Time flies by when you’re content and distracted. And, as the quote above says, I want to feel fulfilled and happy with myself before I can dare try to be someone else’s. Plus, I feel like once I finally really really believe and know that I am so wonderful and such a cherished daughter of God and such a carrier of His glory, then that one special dude will have no problem getting me an amazing ring and will have such respect and gratitude toward me. (I told some of the Epic girls that I for a while have been thinking that I would really like a nice ring, and not just a tiny and unawesome ring… I don’t want a glamorous and super expensive ring, but I also don’t want just any ring.)
Maybe it would be a little frustrating and lonely at times, but I have plenty of hobbies to keep me busy and happy. And of course, there’s the million friends that I have, that I never seem to be able to get enough of… (okay, maybe not a million)
I think it’s that darn Hispanic culture, so many people just get married at such young ages, and I’m not a super traditional Mexican or anything.
I can’t think of very many men that I can look at and say, Yeah, they’re amazing and I am inspired by them. But there are a few that I look at and I really do wonder…
I think it’s so important to be equally yoked not only as in they’re both Christian, but also that they’re both of the same denominations and both of them’s hunger for God is equal. And I don’t know if I know very many boys that are at the level of hunger that I am at; it makes me feel that I really am scaring them all away. But I can’t help myself, I’m like a tree from the rainforest, I need to be watered often and a ton at once.
How is it that people end up getting married? Because it sounds so difficult. They both have to like each other, and I just feel like for the past few years, it’s been that a guy likes me and I don’t like him back, or I like someone but then lose interest or whatever.
Also, that whole, both of them are physically attracted to each other. Some of the guys that I am like wow, I have zero inspiration from their walk with God, and some that I see so much Christ-like love, I have zero physical attraction. Also, I really want a tennis partner.
And I am kind of scared by how quickly I lose interest in guys, I should have seen this coming seeing as how I did not cry when I broke up with my boyfriend of two years during sophomore year… I just shrugged and started going to church.
Do I not attach emotionally to others?
Abba, Your daughter needs some grace this week. I’m a little impatient again.