My heart is so unclean.

I thought I loved people, but God has been telling me… HE loves people.

My team is pretty amazing.

When I look around me and see this completely broken city, I just want to run around proclaiming the name of Jesus, heal the sick, cast out many demons, give dignity to the women that are so scantily clothed, help the addicts become free.

But I… I fear. I judge. I fear some more. I try to close my eyes and pretend nothing is wrong.

Only someone as powerful as God can fix this city. I’m too small to fix this city all by myself.

God, my soul is overwhelmed. I have so much thinking I have to do, and I just love my team. They are so wonderful, I feel so at home and happy.

And to close, the song below is like our theme song during this trip.

When I feel like crying and yelling at myself for messing up the many times I’ve messed up this past week and a half, I just start singing this song, and the Psalms I’ve been reading.

Jesus, your love is so amazing.

—–

Do Your eyes see me now?
Are you smiling, are you proud?
I believe you are…
And this changes everything.

Jesus, your love is so amazing,
And this joy I can’t explain it.
I’m caught up in the fellowship.
I’m caught up in the fellowship.

You’re the one, there you go again,
Lifting my heart, lifting my head.

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